The Abyss

When will I be able to climb out of this friggin' abyss? It's insane how I have plummeted since last Wednesday. Just when you think you are starting to crawl out of the hole, that perhaps there is a greyish light up in the sky, something happens to make you lose your footing and you fall right down to the bottom again.

I think the problem is that every time you are knocked back down, the hole becomes slightly deeper. It becomes impossible to even sense a top to the abyss. There is no light anywhere. All there is, is a murky darkness that completely envelopes you. Its tendrils grope at you until even despair is lost and there is nothing left but emptiness, a gaping hole where your essence used to be.

So here I am, back at the bottom, too apathetic to even want to stand up and dust myself off from the fall. What does it matter anyway? Nobody else is down here with me. It's so dark that I can't be seen. Who the hell cares if I am covered with dust? Who the hell cares that I am even down here.

Gawd, I can't believe that I have to struggle through another three weeks of work until the end of the school year. I desperately want to give up now. Surely I don't have to see it through until the end. What does it matter?

Mmm, it's better to write in analogies. It doesn't seem so real.