Doin' the Loopy Thang

I'm weirding out a little here tonight. The urges to SH are back. Damn, I miss it. I know that it sounds silly, but I can't help it. It used to calm me down. Sometimes it used to make me feel more real. At other times it actually used to help me dissociate. Who would actually want to dissociate, right? Well, sometimes it is just easier too. Shoot me.

Everything is kinda annoying me tonight. One of the furry kids is laying at my feet. She's licking and licking and licking her paw. Fark! My hubby woke up earlier this evening. The first thing he did was come out to the lounge room where I was sitting watching TV and surfing through blogs, and ask me question after question. Even the little circle thing that's going around and around at the top of my browser window is giving me the sh#ts. For fark sake!! Why doesn't this page just load properly already?? Damn, I'm even rocking back and forth like a psycho as I type this. I've got to calm down a little. Geez.

Okay, what the hell have I done today to encourage this state? Ummm ... nothing really. It's been an average day. I did a load of laundry, ironed for an hour or so, then popped around to *C*'s place to help her with a computer program that I installed for her yesterday. She's one of those computer illiterates. It was a good visit, although I suppose it was "another me" talking during my visit. I still felt like me though. Does that make any sense?

I dunno. I think I will just go and make myself a cup of tea or something. I've already taken my meds tonight so hopefully things will calm down soon.