Karaoke Murri Style

Tonight saw NAIDOC week's final event, "Murrioke", a night of singing and drunken revelry. Although only a small crowd was in attendance, it was a spirited group which was ready to party. Consequently, I would say that a good night was had by all.

I must admit though, that when it comes to karaoke and singing in front of a crowd, I am a huge piker. There is no way anybody would be able to get me up to that microphone and I managed to give it a wide berth tonight too, thank goodness. My dubious singing voice is better left to the confines of the shower.

Although it was a good night and I was surrounded by a bunch of wonderful people, I can't say that I actually enjoyed myself. I don't know what is wrong with me. I tend to feel lost and inadequate in a crowd. My inability to loosen up and just enjoy myself is incredibly frustrating. I think I need to bash my head up against a brick wall several times and just get over myself or something. Grrr at me!

Don't get me wrong though. Tonight certainly didn't suck by any stretch of the imagination. I'm starting to get to know these people quite well and I truly admire them and they are a joy to be around. I think I am just firmly entrenched in my non-feeling, non-emotional state at the moment, hence the ambivalence.